when life gets in the way, Part 3

I have a dear friend who adopted me as a little brother shortly after we met. She has no family and is (except for a few very close friends) alone in this world . She’s beautiful and smart and intelligent and just an amazing person… she’s the big sister I never had.

She also has a natural maternal streak in her and as such is quite protective of me, too.

I told her about my new infatuation and she says, “jules, please be careful.”

She said it the way a parent tells their child when he’s messin’ with something and getting hurt is inevitable. And instead of taking the child out of the situation, the parent let’s a “you’ve got to learn on your own” lesson happen.

So instead of ordering me to keep away from this girl she just tells me “please be careful.”

She knows me. She knows it’s been so very long since I’ve had anyone in my life who I really loved and loved me back. Maybe that’s why she didn’t order me to stay away and instead just said “please be careful.”

She made dinner for me and some friends at her house one evening in December and my birthday is very close to the end of the year. While having some drinks afterward she snuggles up against me hugging me tight, laying her head on my shoulder and asks, “what do you want in the New Year, Julie. What do you want for your birthday.” (i hate to admit it but she calls me that sometimes… i like jules better. I think i could handle Julie better if it was said the way Rocky would say it. You know… “hey juLee” Hey Adrienne… Hey Paulee… Hey juLee.)


I don’t know why I felt compelled to answer the way I did. Was it because I was close to turning 40, feeling nostalgic at the New Year approaching… or had just enough Fat Tire Amber in me that sis had bought for me? I don’t know.

So I answer her by saying, “I want to meet someone. I want to meet the right someone. That’s what i want in the new year.” Our other friends (all women) gave the obligatory “awww” and hugged me. Saying I’m too nice a guy. I’ll meet someone.

And so… here I am, mid way through the new year and I’ve met someone…. I think I may have met a right someone. I think I may have met a right someone who could possibly be THE one.


But maybe I should have also told sis “I want to meet the right person at the right time.”

If you hadn’t read my previous posts on this, the quick run-down is: my latest infatuation is married but going through a divorce. They live in separate homes but interact with each other on a daily basis as if still married. She and I met about three weeks ago after having met three years earlier while working on a project together. Since meeting again, we’ve been working together on a rush project that involves her husband and a few other people. Because of that project we have talked on the phone just about every day and through our conversations have also grown very close.

So back to the “But…”

As the saying goes… all things come to an end. She just told me she can’t talk to or see me any longer. She is surprised at what strong feelings she has developed for me in such a short time but she and her husband are going to try and reconcile and it would be best if we didn’t communicate any longer.

I wish sis would have ordered me to keep away from her. I wish she would have said, “quit messin’ with that. You’re gonna get hurt.” [sigh] 😐


3 responses to “when life gets in the way, Part 3

  1. I’m sorry to hear how much pain you have experienced while searching for the right person. I hope you find someone wonderful.

  2. Thank you… i appreciate your words of sympathy. It’s very kind of you. I’ll be ok. A few years ago I dated a girl for about a month. And after she ended it, the next day she e-mailed me asking if I was alright. I said, “well, it certainly does sting but I’ll be ok. I’m a big boy… this isn’t my first heartbreak and I’m sure won’t be my last.”

    This stings a little right now, but I’ll be ok.

  3. Damn stingers. Sometimes it’s hard to get them out, eh?

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