another wedding

My best friend… my closest, dearest very best friend got married recently. It was bitter sweet.

I have known her for almost 23 years. That fact alone is amazing to me.

I met her when she was 17… just a girl. She was a senior in high school and I, a freshman in college. She had come up to visit her brother who I knew through the music department and I was smitten at first sight.

Apparently she was, too. We were inseparable when she came to school the next fall. For three years we were together. At different times in those three years, we were in the band together although she was not a music major. We worked together although i was not a very good waiter. And we lived together for a year… neither one of us very good at compromise. Children playing house we were.

She transferred to Texas A&M and we kept a long distance relationship, talking of marriage and were making plans for the future. We mad God laugh.

Things didn’t quite work out and after our very hurtful, accusation filled breakup, we didn’t see each other for nearly nine years as we went our separate ways… both of our lives taking unsuspecting turns and leading to disappointing marriages. But Life has a nice way of putting people back in touch when healing has happened and now we are friends again. Very, very good friends.

And so, when she asked… I designed her invitations for her. And when she asked I took her bridal portrait for her. And when she asked (rhetorically of course) “well, you’re gonna be there right? You’d better be there.”

i was.

She told me she had even thought about asking if I would stand in the wedding party on her side as one of the bridesmaids (a la Made of Honor) but she didn’t think I would have done it and it was a little late to find me a tux (actually… too late to get a

vest the same color as the girls’ dresses, by the time she thought about it.)

I would have done it and gladly.

She looked beautiful and happy and radiant on her day. Here is a picture of her dancing with her daddy for the father/daughter dance.

She has turned into such a beautiful woman. I am so lucky to have her as my friend and am absolutely amazed to witness and be privilege to watching her evolve from a girl I first met 23 years ago into an amazing, kind, gentle, resolved, strong woman.

And so… dear reader, you can see how it is bitter sweet. I love her… not in romantic, I’m-pining-for-her-from-afar kind of love. No, I love her beyond an amorous or romantic relationship. She is one of my soulmates. I love this dear friend of mine in a way i almost can’t describe.

I am so happy for her and excited to see what will be the rest of her transformation. Of course there is a part of me that wishes I hadn’t been so foolish and squandered the opportunity of being right by her side instead of at a distance taking pictures.

oh well…. live and learn.

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4 responses to “another wedding

  1. I’m lucky to have some good women friends, too. I think this is more common now that it used to be — I don’t know. Like it was more of a societal taboo, once upon a.

  2. You know, i didn’t mention this part that her new husband has been really, really cool about letting me continue our friendship. They now live in San Antonio (3 hours away) but when she lived here, he had no problem with it. In fact, he would joke around about how I was the other boyfriend who helped do some of his boyfriend duties, except the good ones. 😛

  3. except the good ones

    Ha! Good line. I wish I’d thought of it.

  4. It’s pretty cool that you could take part of her big day and that you have such a great relationship. Although you feel like “you’re standing at a distance, taking pictures,” your connection with her translates into your photography… and records her day in a way that she wouldn’t have received from someone who didn’t know her well. 🙂

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